With bare-knuckled honesty and humor, this memoir follows a young woman's search for a way out of her despair. Leaving her husband and their lives in New York City, Yoder moves to the countryside, where she collects stories from her aging Pennsylvania Dutch Mennonite grandparents. With her marriage hanging by a thread, she faces her demons to make peace with a heritage she has felt at odds with. Yoder's account of that year is one of the first Mennonite memoirs of its kind.
"Normal...had gone out on a long walk without saying when she'd be back," the author writes in the first chapter. As she listens to her grandparents and works with a therapist, Yoder begins to understand what she needs to do to save herself and her marriage. As she searches for a semblance of peace apart from the religion she has left, she discovers unexpected answers.
"Home is simply a memory, a place that no longer exists in the real world after you've been away for a long time," Yoder writes. "But you can try to return... with a little of you, just that teeny part that agrees to go." Both her project and the rural surroundings help her slow down the pace of her days: "Sitting and listening to my grandfather talk, with the many silences that filled the spaces between his thoughts, time took on a different meaning. I didn't have to be anywhere but here..." Exploring at this new pace, she embraces the unexpected nourishment she finds. Originally published in 2003, the book includes favorite traditional Pennsylvania Dutch recipes from Yoder's grandmother, including Dutch Goose ("Pig Stomach") and shoo-fly pie recipes. This 2025 version includes book club questions, an original, mixed-media drawing by Yoder's sister, artist Juanita Yoder, as well as minor revisions.
